Reviewed by Rebecca Oxtoby

Author, Mum, highly specialist speech and language therapist, Nutella addict

Before parenthood, I was an enthusiastic career woman, working as the Clinical Lead for Stroke for Speech and Language Therapy, at an inner-city hospital. I was used to a busy ward, an inbox full of work demands and a caseload as long as my arm.

When I had Isabelle, everything changed. I expected the overwhelm, the sleeplessness, the saggy belly and the Sudocrem stains, but I didn’t expect to feel underwhelmed by it all. I didn’t expect to feel bored. I guess nobody ever tells you that, sometimes, it’s dull as dish-water sitting at home all day with only a teeny person sucking on your nipples for company.

Now, I love my daughter, that’s never in doubt here. I just felt like I lost me. And I knew I wouldn’t be alone in feeling like that.

So, I started to write. I wrote my deepest thoughts; the ones that nobody says out loud. The ones that, sometimes, you wonder whether you should write at all. I wrote about the funny times too, of which there were many. I documented all the #mumfails and I ranted about the crazy things that nobody ever told me about. Like what bin you put the crusty belly-button worm into (NO. Keeping it is NOT an answer). Or the dance routine to wind the bobbin up. Or why you and your husband have to work so hard just to love one another some days.

It’s all in there. It’s funny. It’s real, and I hope it’s relatable to you. I hope you find comfort in knowing it’s not just you, and I hope that your pelvic floor can withstand all the laugh-out-loud moments.

We’re in this together Mamas.

EXCERPT FROM THE BOOK

F

Fear

Science is insane. Mothers have an innate fear for the lives of their children. I’m not talking hand-holding at the roadside or strapping them in on a rollercoaster (those these things are recommended) I’m talking a deep, keep-you-up-in-the-night-even-when-the-little-sod-is-fast-asleep fear of them stopping breathing at any given moment.

This is almost definitely exacerbated by midwives educating parents about Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), the sudden unexplained death of a child under one often in their sleep.

As a result, you spend half the night rocking them to sleep and the other half hovering dangerously close over them to make sure they’ll wake up. Inevitably, you accidentally rouse the little monster and have to start the performance all over again. No wonder we’re all knackered.

The reviews say it all: it’s rated 5* on Amazon, and they’re flying off the shelves. Grab yours while you can…